Funsies (Video Hits Edition)

Posted on January 29, 2011 by melissafed

It is the weekend but my kids are STILL SICK. If I have to miss anything else fun, I’m throwing a chair (or myself) out the window. Not really. But seriously…

I did make it out to the square dance last night and thoroughly embarrassed myself with too much exuberance. Being in the house, with sick kids, for one full month, will do that to you. Thanks to all who came and donated! I think we brought in about $1500! If you couldn’t make it but still want to donate to our awesome friends doing awesome things click here. They could really use some support right now.

While I’ve been at home, I’ve been sucked into this! As if I needed more places online to waste my life.

Steve Hubert is in a movie? I didn’t know that! This is just the trailer, let me know if you can find a way to watch it! Looks like he would be HILARIOUS.

Joined a book club with the old ‘hood girls. Pretty excited by the selection. Also excited for this book to arrive!

New favorites.

Did you know that Joel Thiessen makes films? Did you know he just shot one at the SECRET CABIN!? With emerging (and excellent) Canadian artist named Pat LePoidevin? Super great song.

The conference promo vid for RUSH. These kids are crazy cats. Also love this…it is one of my favorite youth videos in a long time. Oh boy.

I hadn’t seen this video of the youth camp we run! Pretty great!

My dad sent me this super cute video. (DAD! Looks like that video is from here on National Geographic! They post new vids like that often!)

Anyways…hope you have better things to do than watch videos online. I don’t. But enjoy if you are bored like me!

Super Snap

Posted on January 26, 2011 by melissafed

He calls himself ‘Super Snap’. It is his alter ego. He has Super Speed and Super Strength and I can get him to help me with near any task if I say:

“Super Snap, can you use your super speed to rescue a diaper from the bathroom so that I change your sister?”

He turns on his heels, puts his hands on his hips and runs like the wind. I’ve no idea how it began but it is one of the most wonderful things that has happened in my household. I’ve got a soft spot for super heroes. On Monday, he wore his red sequins to school and he would answer his preschool teacher only when she addressed him in his super name.

He says things like:

“This healthy food will make me grow strong, right mom?”

And I breathe yes, and then I slip him a chocolate cookie…the opposite must also be true? A bit of junk food will keep you small right? Freeze him in all his glory?

And then there is today…Today when all the fury that could be contained in a body that small bursts forth. A day I can’t wait for bedtime to come. A day I nearly pull out my hair. A day I want to wear a mask so people don’t know who is parenting that Helion. A day I take his teacher flowers because experience has taught me what her morning will be like.

This tension in motherhood is a gift from on high I’m sure of it. How could we watch them grow if it was all sweetness and light? Our hearts would rip clean out, wouldn’t they? And so we walk this line of pulling them in and shrinking them small, and pushing them out and helping them up.

Later in the day, when we are both breathing deeper, he follows me into the kitchen and says,

“Snuggle me mom?”

And I follow him to the living room and we face each other on the sofa. His long legs reaching past my knees. He looks up at me, and like always, reads this mamma mind…

“I’m going to stay with you forever”

And for that moment we both believe it, and shrink small into each other.

Stolen

Posted on January 19, 2011 by melissafed

It’s the things I’ll never get back that hurt the most.

That time that I didn’t swim because I thought the way I wore swim-wear would cause others to weep.

That time when my new husband went para-sailing but I was sure my 145 lbs would cause the rope to snap and launch me off to space.

The dozen times in high school I skipped my grannys pies, my mothers Sunday dinners.

It’s the million beautiful thoughts I could have thought, the adventures I skipped, the beauty I could have experienced if my mind weren’t riddles with ME and MY BODY.

There are the times now, when I watch teen girls press into walls and try to make themselves invisible. I watch them cross their arms, clumsy, over their middles, hiding roles that don’t even live there. I watch them watch each other with envy and greed, longing for ‘her abdomen’ or ‘her breasts’. I watch them attack each other, thinking if they tear her down, that perhaps as part of the bounty, they will gain her beauty.

I want to scream “GET IN THERE…YOU’RE MISSING IT”.

MISSING IT. MISSING EVERYTHING.

All of it is being stolen from right under your nose. Right under your lips…

There is no greater crime. I’ve never heard better definition of STEAL. KILL. DESTROY.

How about you? Tell me what this sort of thinking has stolen from you?

(Speaking at a women’s group in the morning on body image. I am needing a couple mores stories besides my own. Should you read this tonight…I would love to hear from you. What was stolen? How did you save your thought life from the thief? Thanks for your help!)

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Covenant Love

Posted on January 17, 2011 by melissafed

The pipe organ reaches up high to rafters. Light filters through stained glass and makes jeweled light sparkle. The decorations are simple highlighting beauty of craftsmanship of old church. Candles twinkle in hurricane glass, next to vases filled to overflowing with white roses and lilies, bunches of tulle flow beneath. The benches are bare wood being warmed by family and friends as they collect and the an excited buzz starts to form as long unseen guests find each other again. The groom steps up to the front and he is all nerves and excitement. I’ve never seen him before, but he has the air of humble and humour and I like him already.

Bride arrives on arm of father not with trembling lips but with a face full of joy and confidence stretched across; she wears it well. She is lucky bride who walks down aisle to friends that obviously adore her. To parents that love her. We all enjoy her confidence, and we easily bless union like this…we easily worship maker of community like this. We sense His joy, His capacity for blessing, the privelledge of God chasing passed from one generation to next.

Pastor talks of covenants and what a ring can mean and I take the hand of the one who bears my covenant ring and I remember what that means. Again and again we remember what that means and I silently pledge my faithfulness, my devotion. Not only a pledge to stay beside but to stay faithfully with. In my heart, in my head and in every capacity. To not just tolerate marriage, but to enjoy it. To co-create the worlds safest place for our children. To co-create the worlds most joyful place for both of us.

I’ve no time to waste on a mediocre love story.

466) Two nights away in a swanky hotel never hurt any marriage I know

467) An awesome sister who takes the kids and supplies the time of their lives.

468) Collision insurance

469) SUPER fun second family who I am starting to think of as dear friends

470) Air miles

471) Little people running to greet me in an airport. Mamma joy defined.

472) A husband I adore…

473) Remembering how much fun we have together

474) Remembering 1000 other things we love about each other!

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A Soft Place

Posted on January 12, 2011 by melissafed

I hear a cry from the other room.

My body is certain this is the one thousandth time she has woken tonight.

I throw my legs over the edge of the bed and groan

I huff a small tantrum for the world to see my martyrdom.

But then…

There she is.

Pink cheeks glistening with big wet tears,

chubby fingers reaching for me,

gums crimson red with the burden of erupting teeth.

She knows of no other resting place but me.

And so we fall exhausted into one another.

She fits perfectly into the fleshy place she created on me

as we grew from one to two.

And as the moon filters though the blinds,

I silently promise to always be her soft place to land.

Linking this post from my archives

(that are slowly migrating from my old blog)

to:

Habit forming

Posted on January 12, 2011 by melissafed

I remember still, eight years old, I sipped my canned peach juice off a spoon pretending it was medicine. My neck wrapped tight with wool sock and smothered in vicks vaborub. Every so often mother would stoop with the dreaded Buckley’s mixture and I would gasp it down. To occupy me, my mom slipped me an orange duo-tang, some pencil crayons, a pen. She brought the ‘little brown table’ to my makeshift sick-bed in the living room. I spent the day creating the world of ‘Samantha and Smudge’. I lost myself in words and illustrations and I still remember holding the book at day’s end, proud. I smoothed the cover and held onto it tight. I could hardly wait to show my dad.

I remember in high school, when writing teacher printed off all my writings to take home for herself. I remember the thrill of it, when she returned it with marks and encouragements and author recommendations. She made comments like ‘your writing reminds me of…’. I held onto those words, I tucked them away deep in soul dreams.

I remember when mentor, years later, read a letter I wrote her out loud and she said it, “You should be a writer”. I gasped then I put it quietly aside. I went to nursing school.

Boxes and boxes of words sit happily in my room. Filling shelf space after they have done their job, dancing life into my heart, pulling meaning from ordinary and everyday.

Those soul dreams though? They never went away. In fact they get stronger each year, will not be ignored. There seems to be no other choice for me but to hone this craft. I’m making it habit to pick up pen. I’m setting deadlines on myself and I’m seeing what happens. I’m chasing any opportunity I come across. I’m not letting doubt or fear win.

I’ve no expectation. Twenty minutes on the internet and I know I’ve nothing to say that hasn’t been said, that there are thousands more gifted than I. It isn’t the point. Even if all I ever have is a stack of orange duo-tangs, I know what it does in my heart and that is more than enough.

One of the opportunities I am chasing? A writers retreat. I would LOVE to win my way to explore this passion. Thanks for your consideration Higher Calling Blog!

I Heart WINTER!

Posted on January 10, 2011 by melissafed

My favourite winter photo of this past week. We laughed till we couldn’t stand up on the next sled! BEST.

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Looking Down?

Posted on January 10, 2011 by melissafed

I look down a lot. My husband just called me on it for the 47 ooo time. I tend to ALWAYS see the negatives, the terrifying, the ‘one in a million’ risks, before I can see any good. Its how I role. And I hate it.

Yesterday we went out on a nordic ski and I am a novice so I tended to keep my face down…nose to the grindstone. Every so often though, I looked up and was astounded by the beauty I found myself in. The trees heavily snow laden, the air scented gentle pine, the breeze whispering heavens secrets. I wonder how often that happens? What am I missing when I spend all my time looking down at what I might trip over, instead of looking up at all that I could be experiencing?

Join me in looking up will you?

Thankful today for:

456) Family brunch

457) Fun friends

458) Sledding with my boy

459) A job I enjoy

460) A warm home on this chilly Monday morning

461) A graceful husband

462) Completion of an exciting first step on a journey

463) Lots of feet under my table, or in my living room or under my roof somehow, or in my yard.

464) Little boys who think they are cats 87% of the time.

465) Little girls who think they are snakes 32% of the time

And suddenly, when we look up the world is expansive and beautiful and when we stop looking down somehow we stop tripping.

Funsies

Posted on January 8, 2011 by melissafed

Some fun stuff…

1) We took the kids to their first theatre movie last night. It was 3D! The kids were super cute in their glasses and had a really fun time. Until…the movie started. Then it was too scary. Dang you Disney and your making movies too scary for kids.

2) I made a new friend. She asked me to be her mentor and I don’t really know what that means BUT first and foremost it will mean helping market her fab cd. You can buy it here!

3) I bought the Calvin Klein jeggings at Costco yesterday ($23!). I feel like Liz Lemon.

4) I’m doing this and I’m excited!

5) How fun an idea is Project 365! A picture a day all year! I’ve really enjoyed other friends doing this so am copying!

6) I’m currently recruiting women from WPC to participate in ‘Generations Night’ for February. Interested? Please comment below or email me!

How about you? Any wonderful, interesting or fabulous things you noticed this week?

The Practice of Greatness

Posted on January 7, 2011 by melissafed

I’ve been thinking about calling, and destiny, and dreams, and vision. I’ve been thinking about stepping into them and claiming them and living them. I’ve been thinking about how there is no such thing as greatness and how a life is made by tiny moments that build into our characters and into our reputation and how each one matters. The truth of it is, that vision is never achieved; it is a direction we walk in and true heroes and leaders just continue faithfully in that direction, and suddenly look up to find people walking the same way. Each day it is living the small and ordinary with intent and with focus. Great moments, never feel that way to the people living them, but sometimes upon reflection you realize that moment really mattered; leave you thinking “I just brushed against greatness…I just saw it”. Others noticed that it mattered but that does not mean it is of greater import than the moment that preceeded it or the moment that followed. They are all just moments…lived well…or wasted.

I talked to a friend who said “I don’t know…I’m sick of all this talk about destiny. What if being a mom is enough?”. And my heart cried out “YES” more than enough. The fact of it, when the heroes go home and each of us pick up our lives, that is where greatness really happens. This season I thought about Mary, labouring to deliver first born alone, without midwife, in a barn. She thought I’m sure “This is the WORST. Really God? This is what the result of my saying YES is? Really? This is a great moment? A history altering moment? Really? THIS?”. The truth is that it was, and your very hardest moment could be too. The truth is your character is being revealed and refined by those moments, and by the ordinaries too. How did you treat that child that asked you to play a boring game for the 1000 time? How did you respond to your spouse who was late? Each moment we are determining whether our children, our husbands, our colleagues will rise up and praise us…or if they won’t. Each moment we can take tiny steps toward a dream that dwells deep…or we don’t. There is no arrival. There is no ‘greatness barometer’. There is no knowing…this side of heaven…which moments will prove to be the one that made you great. There is only the intent…to live moments well…and to learn to live in obedience to the Dream Weaver, the History Writer, the Vision Caster, The Destiny Caller. The only one who is Great, all the time.
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