It was one of those nights. I hear little girl whimper from the basement “mommy, I wanna snuggle you!” and how can I resist? And so we sit and we sing and she pulls up her sleeve and says “here you go mommy” as if presenting forearm for skin tickles is a gift to me. It can be you know. Though my head is heavy with 2 am weariness, though I am frustrated with tough child rearing phase. When I could really use a solid eight to recover from a day of pushing and shoving. We are three songs deep when little boy hears lullabies as invitation and stumbles into bed with us. The three of us, curled in bed soft skin all tangled up with mine and I sense this as gift. Two hours later, boy still getting up, back to school nerves all over his thoughts I am sure, it is a little harder to see…
Even harder when we finally get everyone settled down to sleep and neglect to wake in time for first day back to school. Harder still when little girl wakes with angry and heart full of intense.
I want to tuck myself away and hide for a few minutes. Just until coffee starts taking effect. Just until little people get their blood sugar levels up to normal. Just until…
Only when our eyes are wide to blessings do we see them. Only when we fully engage in the moment. Only when we open our hands to grasp it all as gifts and love letters can we truly unwrap it. This is the real ‘until’ we are looking for.
So we sit on the floor. I become teacher and we try to make up for preschool lost with finger plays and show and tell. We engage fully in each other and even potato scrubbing while little voices drift to me from the other room is a gift. Gift. Everywhere. Gift.
556) Clean sheets
557) Nights out with friends
558) A week off with husband
559) baby soft skin
560) Forearms to tickle
561) Little boys to hold in darkest night
562) A bed big enough to hold us all
563) That moment just before I fell asleep when I realized they both were finally settled
564) Coffee…cup after cup
565) Walks with family
566) Watching E eat a huge ice cream cone (and making a serious dent)
567) Red Winged Blackbirds and bays full of ducks
568) New little friends to ride bikes with
569) Herbs De Provence in crock pot stew…smells good already
570) Play dough
571) Super Hero Play
572) Quiet play…
573) A few moments to read…moments VERY well spent.
Back to the trenches friends! Hope your hands are open to gifts today…so much better than clenching in fear or anger!
“this is the real ‘until’ we’re looking for.”
yes. yes, ma’am.